Sha people... Have you ever had to get something off your chest so much that just thinking about it made your heart sink and your body weak? And this problem because of its closeness to the heart, then, flows into and affects other areas of your life. Well I have/had such a dilemma... Today, I actually went and talked to someone about it, hoping that it will be a release or major relief to get that certain issue (area of potential present/future conflict) off my chest...Well, it didn't help at all and I'm wondering why that is... Usually I feel like a million bucks after I've gotten something off my chest, especially if it has been on there for a while like this item... Why do I feel so guilty? I wish I hadn't opened myself up like that! I wish I hadn't exposed myself like that... made myself vulnerable! I guess for me it's too deep and intimate to share my thoughts, my real thoughts! So what do you do in situations like that? Is it better to keep the gwan to yourself and hurt by yourself but be secure in knowing that no one else will know, no one else will get hurt and no one can judge you? Or is it better to get it off your chest, hurting people and opening yourself up for future attack or condemnation from those close to you? To be honest it feels like a lose-lose situation to me.
Hmmm.... I don't know!
(I never meant to hurt anybody!!!)
4 comments:
There's no loss in honesty.
Dont even stress guy. We hurt those close to us, but that's what brings us closer together. When we stick together thru the ruff and tuff.
HA!! For the 1st time a comment of mine actually itemized on ur BLOG!?!? Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!
wow that sounds quite deeply!!! The Don is right there is no loss in honesty...Perhaps... and i am just speculating!! If you have something weighing on you speaking to someone is good.. speaking to the person involved is even better because even if they don't take it well the issue is resolved!(this is in most situations yours might have been different i dont know)
transparency is a deep gwan and can be painful and uncomfortable, but true friendship not only withstands that pain but uses it to become stronger. I think it would totally suck for the people closest to you to love you and yet not know the real you!!! So yes there is a need for sensitivity, but to those closest to you there is a greater need for honesty!
Thats what i reckon...
Cheers
Dottie
Hello gym buddy!
As a resident "hedgehog" which means that my tendency is to hide my issues deep down inside instead of trust and open up to people, I concur that to be transparent and honesty is the better way to go. albeit the more difficult way.
But when we make the decision to open up, the crucial decision we must make is who we open up to. Let wisdom speak.
Test the waters with new relationships, see if people can be trusted or not - you never know til you try. But then if they prove themselves worthy we must also step up to the plate and give a little of our trust.
And if they're not worthy... well don't dump the friendship but at the same time it is not wise to trust an untrustworthy person.
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