This is a shout out to Captain Gunns, Captain of the C.S.U, The Don, the original C.P. himself… I had the honour of bidding him farewell at the airport a few hours ago, what can I say? It was a very sad moment to see a true soldier go. But as I gave the Captain one last salute I couldn’t help but smile, knowing that this is not a goodbye but rather, see you soon!
There is so much I’ve learnt from this man and it ain’t even funny! The funny thing is that he probably doesn’t even realise the impact he has had on my life! Thank you bra! Personally I’ve just lost a good ally but the world had gained something much greater!
Mmilidzi guy, God has truly blessed you! To top that you are one of the few people that I can confidently say that they are living and walking the path that the Lord had given them! You are an inspiration to me and to many others! I can’t wait to see what is coming next! Come thru Guy!!! The ribs are better in Africa! :-)
Wow! It's been so quiet these days in blog land that i had to say hi! I'm sorry for being out of touch (for those that only know me thru my blog item). Over the past month I've been suffering from some serious jet lag! Before you ask... Nowhere... Yep, I haven't been on any plane or left the confines of this so called continent, Australia. Rather, I've been jet lagged emotionally from the trip that we call, life. I had reached a stagnant point in my river of life.
Having just completed my degree... I've been totally bored out of my skull! In fact if anything I've just felt trapped like my mind is in solitary confinement. My mental stimulation had been reduced to playing Fifa 07 and frequent, but financially unsustainable, trips to the cinema and fast food restaurants. Don't get me wrong. That is the life! But only for a max of 2 weeks. Now I'm attempting to get some synapse's action going on by actually doing something that requires me to think, so forgive me it this is the least interesting post you have ever read. But i don't care, I'm just dusting the cobwebs...
The time has come for me to graciously to take my leave from the DJ game… DJ Dee is no more! As y’all would know from a previous post (sorry, to lazy to put a link this time) I have had to retire from the DJ game… I must say I do feel free now! Lighter. The yolk has been removed. It’s funny though that as I hang up the number 23 jersey, like Jordan, I do feel like I’m leaving a bit of who I am on the dance floor…
I’ve never blogged about my DJ experiences but I did have a blast, at times! My last two gigs where quite big. Did one in the Regent Theatre Ballroom, catering to the rich and the really rich! It was a managers’ end of year party for the NAB. There where some footy people there as well as having a great brief encounter with the CEO of NAB! Being a future business man I was really honoured. But apart from the famous people that were in the same room that I was in, it’s the venues that make me enjoy my job. For example, the day after that one, I did one at the Broadcast Café which is by the Telstra Dome. My gash and the view of the Docklands from there was just spectacular. I have really enjoyed the travelling and seeing the different places in Melbourne. I don’t think I would have had the opportunity to travel and see the city in which I live in, if it wasn’t for this job.
To the people I promised that could “tag along” to one of my events… well I haven’t forgotten at all. Something tells me that my leave of absence is only for a season and if you stick with me long enough you’ll see… I’ll come back wearing the 4-5. But for now this chapter in my life has come to a close.
As y’all can probably got from the title from this post and the picture, which in now synonymous with most of my posts. I’m talking about this great movie that Miss Muda had already blogged about and has encouraged me to watch but only watched last night. Now apart from the obvious theme of love which cuts deep into the soul and really makes you evaluate the way you view relationships and the importance of them. I, on the other hand have Something New to tell you, it’s a similar theme but focused differently, something that really struck me in this awesome movie.
Theme that hit me almost immediately, like in the first ten minutes of watching that brilliant movie, was that of conformity. Everyone conformed to a certain lifestyle. A certain way to talk, a certain way to act, a certain way to dress, having certain colours they could paint their houses, to even having a certain type of job that is socially acceptable. People in this movie where really set in their ways and remained in the type-cast stereotypes that society had put them to be in, society really being themselves. It really hit me that this is a reality for so many people in so many different levels.
As you guys know I refuse to be put into a box, to be cast in a mould of someone’s false perceptions of what life should be. But as I watched this movie I realised some of the ways I have been conforming and not letting go and letting flow as the movie encourages. We build our own destinies on what society has us think our destinies should be rather than just really going with our heart. Guys we should not live in bondage to the moulds that a crumbling society would have us live in. The barriers that we see, the obstacles in our way to our destiny are put there by ourselves through our submissiveness to conformity.
The ability to let go and let flow is what frees us. Where we know that there is no wrong path to our goals. Are we not individuals? Are any of your fingerprints the same as mine? Well, so what makes you think that our paths to our individual destiny are the same either? I know it seems almost comforting to have your path laid out in front of you and to live an automaton life, I assure you though you will not find satisfaction. Look at what happened when Kenya tried to conform to the relationship she thought she had always wanted, the socially acceptable path. A deep misery and emptiness filled her because that was not her path or her destiny. We often listen to the other voice that always questions why, instead of the one that says why not.
Wow, I cannot explain how this makes me feel when I see people wanting so hard to conform when they obviously don’t fit the mould, especially when they have a better destiny but are just settling. It rucks me HARD! (I need to breathe…..) Ok I’m preaching again… So I’ll rap it up! Here is all you need to take away from having read this post. Firstly, watch that movie, its deep! Secondly, never conform because you have your own path! Take it! And thirdly, live your life spontaneously, do and try Something New as often as you can, step out of your comfort zone… Let go, let flow!
As you guys should know that coal and diamonds are exactly the same thing.... They are both a lump of carbon. The only difference is that in order to get a diamond you have to put that carbon under immense heat and pressure, much, much more than coal.
You maybe wondering why I'm talking about the formation of diamonds? Well my point is that in order for something beautiful to be formed it has to be put under immense heat and pressure! Otherwise without it all you have is coal! This goes for everything in your life, relationships, school work and especially in your walk with Christ! The list is endless.
We should be thankful for tough times because they lead us to and help us fulfil our destiny! Do you want to shine like a diamond or be thrown into the fire like coal? Taking the easy way out of situations or avoiding them may do more harm than good. It may deny you the opportunities you need to grow in an area that is important. There are valuable lessons to be learnt from every difficult situation that you go through. The people who are able to take from these situations have what i like to call, the diamond factor.
You can always identify the people who have the diamond factor. It's the ones that have been through some hardships but have come out on top. They have that confident shine and certainty about them which tells people that you can throw anything their way and they will come out on top! Difficult situations build them up and rather that pull them down. I want to be one of those people.
Why is it so difficult to let people know that you appreciate them and care for them? Why is it that we, as people, only wait for days that we are “allowed” to let people know how we feel? Christmas, birthdays, anniversaries, etc. If someone means so much to you why don’t you only let then know as often as you can? Why can’t people just pick the phone on a random day and say, “Hey, I just called to say that I really appreciate having you in my life”? LOL! How would you react if someone called you and said that to you? You’d probably think something was wrong or there is some ulterior motive. Well that is sad, isn’t it? Why has society made us numb to receiving and giving praise? Why does it feel weird to say some of these things? Why is it easier to say something bad about someone and so hard to say something good? How easy is it to send a text, a card, flowers or just a simple phone call? It’s VERY EASY! Guys I suggest that you holla at someone and just let them know you care! Life is too short and someone who is here today may not be here tomorrow! Wouldn’t it be a great feeling knowing that people you care about actually know that you care and that you are there for them?
From a very young age I considered myself a “Christian”. I even accepted Christ as Saviour a long time ago! I can honestly say that I’ve loved Jesus since I was about 10 or even younger! But I didn’t have any victory, growth and progress in my life! In fact I backslid so badly that I think I got unsaved, if that is even possible.
And then almost a year ago (end of November) I realised that something was missing in my life. I needed more from what I had. I knew that God loved me and that even though I lived in sin He still came through for me in very impossible situations. What I was missing was victory. I wasn’t living in the strength and power that comes with victory and conquering sin through the guidance of the Holy Spirit!
This year God has moved in my life in leaps and bounds! I found what was missing in the equation for real success in life! Lordship! I had God in my life but I didn’t do what He called me to do! Its sad how many people go through life living like I did, honestly thinking that God is happy with the way I was living! The truth is He is not! He still loves us but we hurt Him and disappoint Him when we live like this.
At the point where I was, let’s say a month ago, with my walk with Christ I thought I was almost there! Almost where God wants me or has called me to be in terms of my commitment to Him! But I realised that I’ve still got a long way to go! Jesus calls us to take up our cross and follow Him daily! He also calls us to sell all our possessions and follow Him. Now what is meant by possessions is not your car, your house or mobile phone, even though that may be the case! It is rather the things of the world that you hold dear to you that stop you from fully following Jesus Christ!
Last week I got convicted! And convicted HARD! Simba, Chax, Zii and I were studying. We were hitting an all nighter when we started talking about music and its effect on people (now that is another blog in itself). Then we got on to the subject of laying things down that slow us down in our Walk! That is when it came to me that the music I listen to, most of it does not glorify God in anyway and rather talks of things of the devil, like lust, violence and other immoral things. But here is the thing, I love music so much! I have over 8000 songs in my iPod. God has called me to delete ALL the songs there that He doesn’t want me listening to and that is probably 7000 songs gone! It has to be done though! It is only through following Christ and doing what He says do we experience true power and victory!
God had also called me to quit my job! The funny thing about this is that God has been giving me hints all along the way that it’s time I gave it up. I really stopped enjoying work and had a million excuses why I didn’t enjoy it and why I should quit. Then during the same conversation with the boys, I realised the real reason I wanted out. I was putting myself in totally Godless places. And to tie it in with the music thing… some of the music I played just didn’t appeal to my spirit and yet I was feeding people this empty garbage! Some of the functions I’ve done are simply immoral to say the least. For instance a few months ago I did a singles party where people “hook up” and in most instances go home with each other. I can see why God doesn’t want me to see or be part of these things! They lead people astray and they really take away from me, spiritually! The money from this job was more than excellent! Working just two nights a week took care of expenses and then some! But I know because I’m doing what God wants me to do that financially I’ll be great without this job! In any case I’m graduating soon so I might as well start looking for a real job.
Anyway, the point of all this is that even though I’ve grown so much spiritually I am still under construction, we all fall short of the glory of God. No matter how much I grow spiritually there is always and will always be room for growth and improvement! We all are under construction and will be until we return to the Father! We have to realise that there are things that are part of the construction process and that includes selling your possessions. What are the things of the world that are slowing down your construction process? Ask God to reveal what they are to you! It will save you a lot of time and pain later because God always gets His way! Even if He has to make you walk around in the dessert for 40 years when actually the journey could have taken you days!
Hi blog friends, it’s been a while since my last blog entry. I’ve been lacking the inspiration to write anything, yet alone something even worth reading. But hey! I’m back but I cannot guarantee the worthiness of this piece of amateur prose, being worth reading…
Before I start let me say that there is no specific incident or occurrence that inspired the words of this blog. I’m just expressing myself as these feelings arise or as I have certain revelations… So the only thing you should be reading into are the words on the screen and not on the street. LOL!
Anyway with all that housekeeping aside….
What do you see when you look at Ndu? (Funny, this question actually relates to the blog carol wrote…) After talking to people and trying to understand how I look in the public eye (even though it doesn’t really matter to me as such). I really see that many people have me confused and they often misunderstand me or don’t see the full picture! So by now you should be getting the reason I called this blog entry “Exposed”. I’m about to expose a truth about me that people don’t really know or really understand…
I’m a really, really shy person! (I can imagine people laughing… but it’s cool coz I’m laughing too) That is really unbelievable coz y’all know me but there is where the problem lies. I am also a loud person! Now how can a person be both shy and loud at the same time, kinda some sort of oxymoron! Well guys its true... There it’s out! It’s a problem I’ve been dealing with for a while…
Unlike most people who hate public speaking and prefer one-on-one conversations, I am the opposite. I prefer large groups, large settings, for me there is safety in numbers. But when it comes to one-to-one gwans, I melt! I never know what to say, I choke and make a quick dash to the nearest emergency exit. I find it difficult to express myself and to even open myself up, to really let someone in. Now the truth is I do let people in my life but it is a very slow and gradual process. And before I do warm up to people I may come across as a snob, inconsiderate or selfish but that is not the case I’m keeping to myself because I’m shy. I’m not open to letting them in, yet. (It’s funny how most of the people who read this will not be on the “shy list”. Maybe I should post this somewhere else for those who don’t know me to see) (LOL).
I also love spending lots of time by myself! This is a bad thing coz I over do it! I am able to let relationships die because I like to keep to myself. I told someone that and they say it’s laziness but I’ve thought about it and I really don’t think so. I just enjoy having a relatively small close circle of friends. I wonder how biblical that is? I really don’t believe it is… But the funny thing is that I don’t feel like my loud side and my shy side are lies. I honestly feel that I am both and I’m comfortable with it. The shyness to me is an internal condition meanwhile my loudness is the external condition, the wrapping for my internal nature… I just want people to understand that when I’m doing one thing in public and another in private I’m not being fake or anything like that. I’m just being me! And as we get to know each other and the shyness melts then I’ll be loud when I’m alone with you…
Hmmm… I wonder what a psychologist would say about this blog (not just a psychologist but anyone brave enough to be reading this blog too) (LOL)… I’d be interested to find out. (Hint, hint) I guess some of the psycho babble they would spew would be like... your loud side is a smoke screen you use to hide your insecurity. You are shy because things that have happened to you in the past. Well that could be true to a certain extent but it doesn’t change who I am today! This is me… then, exposed.
Sorry Guys this blog post will be indefinitely delayed due to creative and moral reasons... Like they say in the ads in Zim... "Any inconvenience is sincerely regretted."
Alarm bells ring… Sirens howl… Dogs bark… Spot lights on! Snipers in position! The sound of heavy boots marching up and down the hallway with fully armed men ready… ready to kill! Inmates in their cells absorb the atmosphere and blaze the prison with their cheers and jeers… Over the P.A. system it is announced, “Code Blue everybody! Prisoner 210984 missed rollcall! He is trying to escape… Gentlemen we want him back dead or alive, what ever it takes, do not let that monster leave this facility!”
This week has seen the most aggressive attempt by Dee to try break out of prison to date. It was a close call, if it wasn’t for the fact that Warden J.C. was on duty, things could have ended in a bad way…
Have you ever had one of those weeks that ended in complete chaos and you never even saw it coming? It kinda sneaks up on you like a tram inspector! (LOL)Those are the weeks that the enemy escapes and runs amuck! LOL! Looking back on it, it is somewhat funny how that smallest break in defences or the letting down of the guard of a minute inspires a full frontal onslaught from the enemy, the deceiver and the accuser!
My problems this week seemed numerous but I think giving you only a brief synopsis will suffice. It all started when my boss tried to cheat me out of money that he owed me. And because of that I’ve found myself in a financially difficult situation this week. Then I’ve had to renew my visa and that had its own challenges. Then I realised I’m really behind with my uni work and I need to step up my game if I want to graduate at the end of the year. To top that off there was this other personal issue that had really thrown me off! Actually all those other problems don’t matter in magnitude and gravity as much as this one!!! This has been one of my most challenging weeks in a long, long while!
So how did I come from a point of thinking that my world was about to fall apart, to a point where I can put LOL in my blog and add on old ‘tram inspector’ jokes? Well it’s actually really simple, 1 Peter 5:6,7 says, “Humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.” All it took was to give the Lord the burdens of my heart because He cares for us! Obviously it’s easily said than done! And I tried resisting and doing things in my own strength, living in self-pity, but then I got a word, “Your troubles may seem like a mountain but the truth is things could be much worse. There are people out there who are going through more trails than you could handle!” Soon after that I heard news that a friend’s mother has been diagnosed with cancer… Wow! What a realty check is that? Your problems just seem so insignificant! As Christians we should expect trails in our lives! We should expect a bit of suffering, if the devil doesn’t put obstacles in our way then we should ask why we don’t threaten the devil enough for him to try stopping what God is doing in our lives. “Rejoice to the extent that you partake of Christ’s sufferings, that when His glory is revealed, you may also be glad with exceeding joy.” (1 Peter 4:13) I know that my friend is strong! God loves him! God is doing a great work in him and that he has a high calling on his life! “No test or temptation that comes your way is beyond the course of what others have had to face. All you need to remember is that God will never let you down; he'll never let you be pushed past your limit; he'll always be there to help you come through it” (1 Corinthians 10:13 - The Message). I know he will make it through this very difficult time because the Lord will not give him more than he can handle! For Christians the purpose of tests, trails and suffering is to prove their true character, to clear away the impurity from sin and allow the pure nature of Christ to show itself.
This helped me put things into perspective… I couldn’t let my problems beat me down! I had to give them to Christ who will deal with them because Ndumiso is not strong enough to deal with these problems by himself! The devil tried so hard to condemn me for the mistakes I had made this week, for all the feelings, thoughts and actions that were not of God! Dee tried so hard to loose himself upon the world because of the guilt and condemnation that could only come from the devil. Romans 8:1 says, “There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit.” The freedom that comes from a verse like that can not be verbalised! It set me free because even though my mistakes were “fleshly” my heart is in the Spirit! After I had confessed my sins and repented there was no reason for me to live in guilt because the blood of Jesus washed my sins away! AMEN!
So the next time you are having a bad week/day/hour/minute… confess and repent, cast your burdens on to Jesus and walk in victory knowing that you can on longer be condemned! If I had only learnt that sooner my week would not have seemed so difficult! Now Dee is captured once again and I can move on having learned what not do the next time so I can prevent another attempted prison break.
Sha people... Have you ever had to get something off your chest so much that just thinking about it made your heart sink and your body weak? And this problem because of its closeness to the heart, then, flows into and affects other areas of your life. Well I have/had such a dilemma... Today, I actually went and talked to someone about it, hoping that it will be a release or major relief to get that certain issue (area of potential present/future conflict) off my chest...
Well, it didn't help at all and I'm wondering why that is... Usually I feel like a million bucks after I've gotten something off my chest, especially if it has been on there for a while like this item... Why do I feel so guilty? I wish I hadn't opened myself up like that! I wish I hadn't exposed myself like that... made myself vulnerable! I guess for me it's too deep and intimate to share my thoughts, my real thoughts! So what do you do in situations like that? Is it better to keep the gwan to yourself and hurt by yourself but be secure in knowing that no one else will know, no one else will get hurt and no one can judge you? Or is it better to get it off your chest, hurting people and opening yourself up for future attack or condemnation from those close to you? To be honest it feels like a lose-lose situation to me. Hmmm.... I don't know! (I never meant to hurt anybody!!!)
Wow!!! It’s rare that I get to do one notable and amazing thing once a month but I guess September is just my month… In just one week I’ve been on a television show and I’ve seen Hillsong United perform live! My GASH!!!
On Friday I went and saw Hillsong United… Nyasha truly blessed me with this amazing opportunity! To be honest I don’t even know how I ended up going to the show (especially for free). All I remember is Nyasha asking me to give her a ride to the item, next thing I know is she had sourced the ticket items (come thru Dale) and we were set! To make things even better we bumped into Stacey, who I hadn’t seen in years (hehe I do that a lot – bump into people I haven’t seen in years). The circumstances had us set up for an explosive evening!
What can I say? It was deep! A seriously deep, Holy Ghost party! These guys came thru… The sound was surprisingly exactly like their CDs (having been to many concerts you find that the sound is not usually the same)! The energy levels were explosive, but what do you expect it was at a youth item! I’m actually quite speechless when it comes to this gwan because it was so deep that words will cheapen the experience, but let’s say I don’t mind travelling to Sydney to check em out again!!! And I’m sure that Nyasha wouldn’t either…. She missed out on her heart throb… Marty Sampson A.K.A “Mighty Simpson”. LOL! So I’m sure she wouldn’t pass off that opportunity!
Hey, I feel another potential blog in the making, “Sydney – the Hillsong road trip”, holla back guys, let’s make this road trip happen, live! Anyway until then enjoy the video we took at the concert! This was the first song – The Time Has Come. See it though our eyes!
Hey guys I’m sure y’all are interested to find out if we are now rich (like Dave Chappelle)? Well champs… read and find out! LOL!
Once upon a time there where two people called Dorica and Ndu… It was a warm March evening, when Ndu’s favourite show came on. Ndu wished he could be on that show and even told Dorica how he was almost on it but had an exam on the day of the audition so couldn’t make it. That is when the penny dropped. Just because I had missed the opportunity didn’t mean that I couldn’t seek it again, didn’t mean I couldn’t live the dream. So with that Dorica and I jumped on the computer and set on our quest, the quest to be on Deal or No Deal!
Now the actual process for applying was quite easy. All we did was get on to the website and apply! Simple huh!?! (LOL) But the wait was long… then, Tuesday 25th of July we saw the light at the end of the tunnel! After four months of waiting and four months of sceptical comments from Miss Mushambi… we got our audition. At this point we were also allowed to bring friends along to audition. That is when Carol (because she was Dot’s tail) and Linton (because we tight like that) join the picture. Linton and I blew the audition out of the water (well, Lint flirted with the chick that interviewed us), we murdered that item! We knew for sure that our spotlight was gonna shine on us and soon! The interview process was fun, I remember some of the discussions we had where some people were concealing their age (Carol), and others had trouble remembering the craziest think they’ve ever done (Dot)! There are other things that can’t be repeated but yeah even just the interview process was one to remember.
Then… the call came in a week before the shoot! I remember being in a bad mood that day and I almost didn’t pick up the phone because I didn’t recognise the number but something told me to pick it up... It was one of the producers of the show. As usual, he had trouble pronouncing my name but I didn’t care, he was offering us a once in a lifetime opportunity to be $200000 richer literally over night. The date of our destiny was revealed… the 12th of September 2006. Suddenly I forgot I was in a bad mood and for some reason the sun seemed to shine brighter and warmer, all my worries melted away. Was that to be the date I’ll forever remember as the day I could afford my drop top 645i BMW (add that to my birthday wish list)? Without delay, as soon as that phone conversation was over I called Lint and Dot to let them know that the day of reckoning was nigh… I forgot some people were at work but I didn’t care, the good news had to be spread.
I don’t know about the others but I spent the week figuring out what I would buy with that dough (and how my tithes would be a bit more impressive (LOL)). We even started figuring out how we would split the money between us… We (I) came up with a cool but fair system. 40, 30, 30. 40% would go to the person who opened the cases, and 30 each to the others and if people guessed what was in their cases successfully they would keep the money even if it was a mega guess. If you don’t know what I’m talking about then watch the show sometime! Our game plan was tight. And there was a chance that the money would only be split in two because someone was having trouble getting time off work and was reluctant to call in sick… Oh well you’d all be happy to know that all three of us ended up going and all potential winnings would be split in three...
Finally the day came! I got up early, I didn’t want to miss our 8.45am curtain call so I was up at 6. I nervously got ready putting on a white shirt that I had ‘ironed’ the night before and some tan coloured formal pants. I was dressed to kill. So the plan was to go by train to the city from my house so I had to go pick up Dot and Lint then we’d leave together. So I rocked up at Lint’s house first and to my surprise he was wearing the exact same thing as I was… The only difference, I was wearing black shoes and he was wearing white… (Can you handle?) But time was not on our side so changing of clothes could not be done. As you can understand Dot found it thoroughly funny, when we picked her up, that we were wearing the same clothes. Lint and I had to put up with jokes the whole day and not only from Dot but random people too. Next time dress coordination has to be discussed. Anyway we finally got to the channel 7 studio in Southbank.
Now we waited anxiously, signing forms and putting on name tags. I bumped into Karen someone I know but hadn’t seen in a long time so it was cool to see and catch up with her. We must have waited an hour (well it felt like that) before they let us into the studio. Wow our time had come. To back track, during the day they were gonna shoot five shows through out the day. So we had a one in five chance of making it on to the show… Anyway back to the studio. We entered the studio and that is when it finally hit me that this was real! We were really gonna be on an Australian television show! The set was so small compared to what it looks like on TV. It was still really flashy with high-tech cameras and big TV screens etc. It was tight!
Once we were all seated they showed us a short video on the do’s and don’ts.Basically it was like don’t be boring and always be lively. But from the crowd that was there, no one needed encouraging to be lively, everyone was excited and there was a huge buzz in the studio. We met the producers who were really cool. They were there the whole time telling jokes and interacting with the crowd. Even during filming they were standing around literally doing their own thing. It was really cool! Lint was long distance flirting with the girl holding bag number 6… Ya, we caught him in the act so he can't deny it! The actual filming process is like done in five minute blocks. They were so many breaks that it took about an hour per show but it didn’t feel like that. The host Andrew O’Keefe was so funny and really connected with the crowd! (He was wearing $8000 shoes – just needed to let everyone know) Just the experience for me was worth it! The money would be a huge bonus but just the experience of it happening before your eyes was worth it alone!
The first show came and went and they were now randomly selecting the next block to play in the next game. Wow to our surprise it was us!!! I was so, so excited that I picked up Dorica with one hand and dragged her across the block to hug Linton with the other! I’ve warned you guys so don’t be shocked when you see something like that on TV… (LOL) We had made it on to the podium, we were close to winning real money. I was so nervous (as you’ll see on the show), my hands were sweaty and I could barely stand! If I were I girl it would be one of those moments of continuous, uncontrollable screaming, but since I’m a guy, I internalised it and suffered for it! Time came for us to answer questions to actually play for the money… the first question was about Dracula so we were cool, then came the second question… what a wreck! They asked about cats. What self respecting black person knows anything about cats? All three of us got that question wrong. The next question didn’t matter coz we knew we had just tanked! We were still happy coz we stood to win $500 each or if one of us were given a mega guess could have won $10000. Lint was holding case number 3 I had case number 5 and Dot had case number 6 (I think that’s right). Unfortunately none of us guessed right but to my credit I was the closest (LOL).
Our dreams for big cash on the 12th of September died! We left without the money but we left with an experience none of us will ever forget! We even had a brief encounter with Andrew O’Keefe afterwards, he even touched my shoulder (on purpose), so I’m never gonna wash my white shirt (LOL)… Carol you should have been there with us! With that we happily left the studio to have some free snacks (with salt – ask Dot about that). Outside the sun was still shining brightly and so were our moods! We decided to go celebrate and have lunch on the Southbank (there is another blog from that coming soon…)! And that was our Deal or no deal experience! We don’t have any of our own photos coz Dot thought it would be funny to bring a camera with no battery! Unfortunately we wont be able to let you know when the show will be aired, they only tell that to the people who actually win some money, so keep your eyes peeled every Monday to Friday at 5.30pm only on Channel Seven.
Just wanted to let you know that I'll be podcasting... So when ever i think there is a song that expresses who i am, or i find a song that i feel like i need to share, like Violet Moyo's tracks, i won't hesitate! So enjoy the first selection...
We have Violet Moyo... Zim's finest... LOL!!! Personally i recommend No More Pain. Listen to it to the end, you might find yourself needing a serviette!!! She is so so so funny.... No this is no joke. This is the real deal!
P.S. I do have more than one song on my podcast. All you have to do is press the the "POSTS" button on the media player and you'll see the list of songs. ;-)
Hi People. I'm back yet again but this time I have be asked to talk about something someone else has written. Dorica, some who needs to join the blog world, has a journal entry (or blog) on her hi5 site. Now this blog touches on some really deep and sensitive issues when it comes to relationships.... (How funny, coz I promised myself that I would try stay away from this subject in my blogs.... well... champs...) If you have a couple of hours you should read it! LOL! Follow the link: Dot's Journal . In fact don't read my blog before you've read Dot's blog first.
Anywhooo... Since Dot asked me to comment on it I'll be as honest as I can possibly be. So take what ever you want and throw out what you don't! (That last comment is directed more at Dot) For a relationship to work you have to give all of yourself. Who has ever half bungee jumped? Or have been on half a roller coaster? It's all or nothing! This does not necessarily mean that you have to lose your individuality because that is very important! But think of it this way, by giving yourself totally away you are in turn being a part of who you really are. God created us to be in relationships where you give yourself, to "be servant rather than be served", to "be last rather than first". So by living in the illusion that life is meant to be lived in total independence where you are not sharing yourself completely with someone is a smoke screen! I know what Dot and many of you are thinking.... What about the other person in the relationship? Well in this case we'll assume all things are equal, i.e. he/she is committed as much as you. Because in any case I wouldn't waste my time talking about relationships which are one-sided or ungodly, so lets assume the best. It is by truly immersing yourself in an experience do you truly enjoy and experience all it is and all it can be...
There is nothing wrong with songs like “Cater to You” which in the right circumstances are complementing, edifying and nourishing relationships. Look at the one side of the coin. If the lady is willing to do these things then the guy must be doing something right. True? And that is where I agree with what Dot says. It is a partnership! The ultimate team! (There is no I in TEAM) So yes everyone must have equal bargaining power! It's very very important to have a united front in a relationship! Communication is important and as much as the man has the final say in family decisions he should value his wife's opinions and views and should always have her in mind while making decisions.
(Bra!!! I've gone way off topic... Let me get beck into it!)I agree that people foolishly think love is blind. That is wrong love is pragmatic, well real love is anyway. It is a choice, a balance of options. People, never let emotions run you life! Love has to make sense! We can not expect to change the nature of people, we can not expect that circumstances will make it so that things work out better for ourselves. What we so often do as humans is staring at the doors that are closed and don't see the open ones... That's how (finally) the forbidden fruit comes into it! People so readily jump on the first train/tram/bus without even making sure that it is going to the right place yet alone same direction as you want to go in life. Only to get caught by those pesky inspectors for fair evasion and then realise that is not even the route they wanted!
Good things come to those who wait! It's sad that we live in a society that is all about instant gratification. Instant messaging, 2 minute noodles, microwave dinners, drive thrus, e-mail, vending machines unfortunately there is nothing lasting in any of these things! So why do we try put our souls in the same packaging? The false preconceptions that are put on our head that faster is better is wrong. So as much as that forbidden fruit may seem sweet, think... don't feel that comes later! A friend once told me when I was once considering in partaking in some forbidden fruit, when finding someone who is for you (i.e. not forbidden) firstly love them with your mind, then with your heart then finally with your body. Personally I've found that this works for me as a test, I used to get to order mixed up some what...
SO... I guess there are a couple of "desperadoes" are sitting there saying, "It's all fair and fine to sit there and wait for the fruit to ripen or to receive the fruit that is promised to you but what do we do in the meantime?" Well Dot put it so well, "Suck the marrow out of life!" Enjoy your life, not indulging in forbidden fruit but enjoy all the things that you should and can do before you are committed! What you do before you are married is as much a part of your destiny as what you do when you are. Stop looking at that door that is closed and look at all the ones that are opened wanting you to see what is behind them! Singleness is a blessing as much as being married! So stop looking at is as a curse and filling that self created emptiness, with the forbidden fruit!
Wow! It’s already been 2 months… I remember the first time I met Carol! It was at Victory Weekend. I remember going and saying hi to her… She looked so lost and bewildered… I felt bad, like I had come on too strong but now I realise that was just Carol being Carol (constantly jetlagged)… Since then I can honestly say we’ve come a long way. She had been able to put a couple of words together to form sentences… LOL!
Seriously though. It funny how God brings certain people in and out of our lives so unexpectedly who bless you! Carol is one of these people! She is so naïve (in a good way), cheerful, honest and a really fun person to be around! I’m glad I got to know her! I hope though as she goes back to England she won’t forget us… All the new friends she has made and all the things she learnt! In any case if I miss her too much all I have to do is get on the phone and sing for her… (hehehe)(inside joke)
Carol thank you for coming thru!!! May God bless you in all you do!!! You are a truly special lady!
Well… I’m sure most of you have watched the movie Fight Club… For those that haven’t, in a nutshell, it is a long convoluted movie about a dude with two personalities, staring Edward Norton as Tyler and Brad Pitt as… Tyler (hehe). For conversation’s sake, we’ll call Brad’s character Tyler and we’ll call Edward Norton’s character simply, Ed….
In my personal life movie, Dee is Tyler and Ndumiso is Ed. Tyler represents the fun and the exciting side that Ed lacks. Ed hopes for something to happen in his life to make it worth living, even accidents and catastrophes so that his life has more meaning. He is lost in the world of superficial beliefs and expectations from life. Ed goes to many different support group meetings for many different ailments for a sense of family. It is only in the presence of people who suffer that he feel that he belongs. His life is full of material goods that he uses to express himself but even this is not enough. “You buy furniture.You tell yourself, this is the last sofa I will ever need in my life.Buy the sofa, then for a couple years you're satisfied that no matter what goes wrong, at least you've got your sofa issue handled.Then the right set of dishes.Then the perfect bed.The drapes.The rug.Then you're trapped in your lovely nest, and the things you used to own, now they own you.” After his apartment with all his worldly possessions catches fire then everything he has ever known burns.
“Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy s*** we don’t need. We are the middle children of history. No purpose or place. We have no great war (in our generation), no great depression... Our great war is a spiritual war. Our great depression is our lives. We’ve all been raised by television to believe that one day we will all millionaires and movie gods and rock stars. But we won’t. We are slowly learning that fact. And we are very, very pissed off!”
Tyler fully takes over the life of Ed. “It’s only when we’ve lost everything that we are free to do anything.” And Tyler is freed and let loose on to the world.
What is so special about Tyler? Well he represents all that Ed had ever wanted to be… All he aspires to be, all he perceives a man to be is all in Tyler, fast cars, faster women, money, untameable, rebellious, a serious bad boy and ultimately a free spirit with nothing holding him down (truly wild at heart). Tyler expresses himself in anger, lust, recklessness and bitterness. “It used to be enough that when I came home angry and knowing that my life wasn't toeing my five-year plan, I could clean my condominium or detail my car.Someday I'd be dead without a scar and there would be a really nice condo and car.”
Ed and Tyler are polar opposites. But they share the same body… Huh? When Dee did his own thing, it was an outer body experience for Ndu. I’d do things and only realise later the extent of the things I had done… Wow… How weird hey! It was like watching a total stranger doing something. You have no connection what so ever. I even had my own Marla, who was in my life story. But that is another blog which I honestly don’t think I’ll ever write. Sorry! But if she ever reads all I have to say to her is (I’m gonna have to steal yet another quote from the movie, actually the last line of the movie). “You met me in a very strange time of my life!”
Anarchy rules where there are no rules and that was the life of Dee and Ndu. Ndu was never strong enough to overcome the sweet and recklessly adventurous life that every man yearns for that every man needs which Dee offered. But as you watch the movie, you realised that the world Tyler/Dee offered is nothing but a trap. “Nothing was solved when the fight was over, but nothing mattered.” Soon you become a slave to your known need for self gratification. And your own plans end up being self destructive. If you let Tyler take over your life he will take over everything. You will eventually lose you true identity. “Tyler’s words coming out of my mouth…. and I used to be such a nice guy.” Eventually these two characters start to blend and become one, they would have been lost in each other. One had to die for the other to survive? Who would you kill? Tyler or Ed? So why Fight Club? Of all the movies of sick twisted people who think they have dual personalities why this one? And also with all those other introspective movies that truly tackle internal conflict within people what is so special about this one? After that build up you’d expect some really cool answer… Well the truth is this movie represents the internal conflict in me. The constant fight within me, of such a twisted and dark nature, that this movie, as harsh as it may be in some scenes, really reflects and outlines me!
The origins of this guy that was known as Dee are quite mysterious. Some say he was always there in me, just in hiding. But I remember when things started to change for me. I remember when the way I started to think shifted. I call that time ‘the turning from innocence’. This is when I was a younger lad and came into a foreign nation. I can’t blame this nation though for this change in such an innocent boy. Rather it was the enemy’s perfect time to catch the fish out of water. I was already a wild one before I came to Australia but it was when I felt that surge of freedom, that boundary less outback of my heart calling me. That is when something stirred up in me. I set forth to create and mould, by my own strength, myself into the person I thought would best flourish in a world that had no rules and required no accountability. From this Dee was born.
Dee was the side of me that I guess I had always wanted to be growing up. The wild one that all the boys wanted to be around and the girls couldn’t get enough of… That was the plan. As time went on I got what I wanted. But that wasn’t enough I started engaging in more and more destructive behaviour that was more than just immoral but even illegal. (I won’t go into details because I don’t want anything in writing that I can incriminate myself with! LOL!!!) Basically like everything else of the world it goes bad, decays and ends up valueless. That was me inside. God had had enough of my disobedience and things in MY world started to crash around me. My world that I had created was not strong enough to hold the burdens of the world as well as the burdens and shortcomings of my soul. It couldn’t give me the security I needed, the comforting love I longed for and the strength that I so desperately wanted. I simply wasn’t strong enough… I had to run, run far and run hard!
I ended up applying for my transfer from Warrnambool to Melbourne lying to my then girlfriend saying that I wanted to move so that I could be closer to my sister when she came to Australia and for my course and stuff, just to justify me having to leave her. These reasons were/are also valid reasons for my move but the real deal is that I needed to get away, run away from the snares I’d set up for myself. God was giving me a way out of that life and I was gonna use it without hesitation. I needed to e-vac so also ran away from Australia. I went home. Home is always a good place to get back into your old shoes. I was able to start picking up my pieces in my life that were misplaced or broken obviously with only the help of God. God gave me a second chance.
God sentenced Dee to death. Locked him up and put him on Death Row… Every now and then I hear him screaming from his cell. And to be honest there are parts of me that miss him. I know though every day that passes and that execution date draws nearer his shouts become fainter and fainter as he loses hope of escape. (the dude has tried some prison break stunts but God the Guard and Keeper of my soul has caught him every single time)(Come thru) This is my personal confession. Dee must die!
Welcome to my transitional site... Transitional? You might ask. Well Champs, the truth is that this is all about me.... LOL! No, this to me is an opportunity to catch the transition on record. This is my opportunity to see the exit of the guy formally known as Dee and the transition to the man i was born to be... Ndumiso. So when you see coming soon as the title of my first blog, please do not be confused. Understand that Ndumiso is coming soon and the guy that people once knew as Dee is now taking his place in the most recent chapter of my history book.
So i invite y'all to come join me in the journey through my mind, deep in my soul, with my left turns and consequent right turns. My insights, my contradictions, my confusions, my inspirations, my journey. Welcome this all exclusive look at the world of Ndu.... COMING SOON....
Hey Guys,
